Do you worry about postpartum depression issues related to giving the baby up? Or do you feel like the overwhelming sense of doing something awesome for someone will compensate?
In a few words, No and Yes.
That being said, I'm not going into this with unrealistic expectations. Right now I feel like I won't have much problem delivering a baby and having it go straight into the arms of it's mother. But when that time comes and my hormones are shifting and surging I'm almost sure I will have some sense of loss. That is why I am trying to prepare myself for that even when I don't feel that way right now. Just thinking about how joyful the moment will be when my IP's physically have their baby in their arms reminds me why I'm doing this and makes me so happy that I'm able to do this for them. There are some women out there who are Traditional Surrogates, meaning the baby they carry is biologically their own (they use artificial insemination) and that I know I could never do. I would never be able to give up a baby that is mine. It takes a very special person to do that, and many families have been helped by them.
Joe and I have talked about planning some sort of vacation after I deliver so that I will have something to look forward to. The timing will have to be just right, though, because he'll be in school, as will the boys. I'd love to be able to just get away with Joe and go somewhere we've never been before. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids, but I'd like this trip to be as stress-free as possible! :) So, hopefully we'll be able to work something out around our schedules.
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