Ok, so we left off with Gianluca's birth. Everything was looking fine and dandy with him. After getting me all situated, I sat up in bed to hold him and my ears promptly began ringing and I got a very disconnected feeling in my head. Just as I voiced this to Amanda, my nurse, the machine taking my blood pressure started to alarm. Yeah, my blood pressure was 70's/30's. I don't remember the exact numbers, but it was low enough that she immediately laid me flat again and opened my IV wide to get extra fluid in me. Slowly my BP came up and my symptoms went away, buuuut I was having some major bleeding. Normally after delivering a baby, the top of the uterus can be felt around the belly button. The last time the doctor had felt mine this was about where it was, however after laying me back down and feeling it again it was over to the right and nearly up to my ribs. I was having some major bleeding and, having been a VBAC, the first thought was that my uterus was rupturing. This is nothing to screw around with and the doctor made it clear to me she was not keen on waiting to see if the bleeding slowed down. In the mean time, the room filled up with several other nurses who came in to help. About 5 minutes later ( or less maybe) the doctor told me she felt that we should get to the operating room. I just nodded and said okay, whatever you think is best. That sent everyone into a flurry. As in, emergency-stat-get-moving-now mode. Sarah snapped a quick pic of me halfway holding the baby. All I kept thinking about was another coworker (and friend) of mine who had had a baby a little more than a year before and was sent to the OR emergently afterward. But, I never had a sense of "impending doom" or like I wasn't going to make it out. Except just before we went through the OR doors I thought about my life insurance policy. Yeah, I know that sounds dumb. I didn't even remember that I had this thought until a week or so later and I totally started laughing at myself.
The last thing I saw before leaving my L&D room was Sarah crying and saying she was so sorry. That was when I kinda lost it too. As they wheeled me out of the room, I squeezed my eyes closed so I wouldn't have to look at any sad eyes as I went by.
I really lost it once I was in the OR. I had nurses on either side of me telling me everything was going to be ok. Keep in mind these are girls that I work with and know well. It was comforting, but sort of scary to see the worried looks on their faces. And then a CRNA (certified registered nurse anesthetist) was at my head telling me to breathe easy and I would be going to sleep. I calmed down and I remember thinking, "What is going to be my last thought before I go to sleep?" I think that question was also the answer.
Fast forward an hour or two (not sure how long I was out) and I woke up to being wheeled out of the OR and down to the surgical intensive care (SICU.) So, turns out what we thought was my uterus rupturing was actually a piece of retained placenta. That and the lower part of my uterus wasn't contracting down like it should have. Both of which were the cause of my bleeding. In hind sight I really didn't need to have the surgery to see where the bleeding was coming from. But, that's just it. We only knew that in hind sight. My doctor didn't want to waste any time just in case my life was in serious danger. Yes, it made my recovery a little more rocky. I spent 5 days in the hospital instead of one like I had planned. I had to recover from a vaginal delivery and abdominal surgery. Incidentally, I also ended up with superficial phlebitis in a varicose vein in my right leg and had to have some testing done before I could be discharged from the hospital. My hemoglobin level took a couple days to stabilize from having a blood loss. But, ultimately I was fine.
My poor husband, on the other hand, was pretty shook up. I pretty much viewed the whole ordeal with my nurses mind. He, however, saw me being rushed to the OR, saw nurses and doctors with worried looks on their faces, and had to sit and wait to find out whether I was going to make it out of surgery. Though I don't believe my life was every truly in danger, he didn't know that at the time. The next several days after the surgery he sat by my hospital bed and just watched me with a look on his face like he never wanted to leave my side again. I just kept asking him what he was staring at. Did I have something in my teeth?
I hope I never know exactly how he felt while he waited for me to come out of surgery.
God put me in very capable, reliable hands that day. Having the knowledge that I have as a nurse, I can imagine many different outcomes to my situation. I'm thankful I got the one I did.
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