21 weeks

Today we had our big mid-pregnancy ultrasound. Everything looked absolutely perfect! The baby was in breech position (which is ok for now) and was very cooperative. The little peanut was estimated to be about 1 pound 1 ounce, which is right on track.

Of course you're probably wondering...did they find out the sex? Well...yes, but I'm not at liberty to share yet! :) Soon enough, though. Once they tell their families then I'll be sure to post it.

The only issue we saw on the ultrasound was that I have a low-lying placenta right now, but the top of it stretches up to the top of my uterus, so Dr. Bishop is not really concerned about it. Placentas only move up as the pregnancy progresses and the uterus grows. We're going to check another ultrasound in 4 weeks just to make sure, but it shouldn't be a problem.

I'm so excited that everything is going so well. Time is just flying by, too. I'm feeling more and more movement. John (my 5 year old) has been asking me when he'll be able to feel Sarah and Brian's baby move. And Grace points to my belly button and says, "Baby button!"  Not sure where she got that from.

And I can finally say I feel GREAT when people ask me how I'm doing. The fatigue is gone and I've got way more energy. It's wonderful!

Odd Questions I Get

I never mind talking about my surrogacy journey, ever. I love sharing my experience with people and in general most have many questions...sometimes some very odd ones. Here are a few of the ones I can remember most.

"Do you know them?" - When I've had people ask me this they didn't mean was I good friends with them. They meant am I completely doing this blindly for strangers I know nothing about.  Seriously. Of course, I have had people ask if it's for someone I'm friends with already, but on more than one occasion I've been asked if I know WHO THE PARENTS ARE.  This just baffles me. I mean, I know people give babies up for adoption without knowing who their baby is going to, but this situation is a little different...actually more than a little.  We weren't just randomly put together to create a person. Sorry if I'm sounding a little harsh, but I'm always taken aback when I'm asked this.

And then there are the people who do seem a little surprised at how little time I have actually known Sarah and Brian. Which I can totally understand. We met in October and by January I was carrying their baby.  It really is kinda crazy when I think about it, but that is where my faith comes in. I knew I wanted to be a surrogate for 4 years before I acted on it. I knew the type of couple I wanted to carry for. I knew what my intentions and motivations were. I had the support of my husband and family the whole time. And, of course, I prayed about it. And now that I'm carrying their baby, I pray over him too. (I'll say "him" to simplify things) I pray that this child will have a wonderful, happy childhood and grow into a strong, responsible, successful adult. I pray for God's protection to be over him as he grows and develops, both before and after birth.  That even though there will be trials and difficulties in life, that he will be able to learn from these experiences and become a better person because of them. I pray these things over Sarah and Brian's child just as I do for my own children.

Ok, so I went off on a little tangent there, but a good one. Back to the weird people, I mean questions. ;)

"What if you don't want to give the baby up?" - Uuuummmm...it's not my baby to give up. And I really don't want to have my pants sued off.  And I really don't want another baby in my house because it would have to live in the garage. I already have 3 kids sharing one bedroom! No, really I do expect to have some sad feelings when I leave the hospital with empty arms, but when I think about the excitement that Sarah and Brian will be experiencing it makes it all worth it. And believe me, my arms won't be empty for long. My 3 monkeys at home will have them filled back up in no time. Wait, now that I think about it maybe I should see just how long I can extend my stay at the hotel...I mean hospital. ;) Kidding.

And finally, drum roll please.

"Was it planned?" - WHAT?!?!?! (This question wasn't actually posed to me, but to one of Sarah's family members.) I don't think I would've been able to respond.

I'm sure as the belly gets bigger and more people ask me about the baby, I'll get a few more good ones to share.

17+ Weeks...

I had my regular check-up with Dr. Bishop on Friday. Everything went great and I was in and out within half an hour. The baby's heart rate was in the 140's and sounded good. My blood pressure was fine and my weight stayed the same as last appointment, which is fine too.  I've never gained much weight with my pregnancies, which I'm thankful for because I gain weight easily non-pregnant. With my boys I gained about 20 pounds and with Grace I only gained 10. With each of them I lost about 5 pounds in the first trimester, which is true for this pregnancy too. So, I have yet to even gain back the 5 that I lost, but my doctor is ok with that and it's actually pretty common.

One new pregnancy "symptom" I started experiencing this week...Movement! I was really surprised to be feeling the little peanut already, I'm not sure why, but I was. This was about the time I started to feel movement with my boys, but with Grace it wasn't until about 22 weeks because I had an anterior placenta, meaning the placenta was at the front of my uterus and cushioned any little kicks I would have felt earlier.  I was excited to share this news with Sarah and Brian because it's such a reassurance.  I'm sure it's got to be such a good feeling for them.

So, the next appointment will be our mid-pregnancy ultrasound. It's scheduled for May 26th, so I'll be 21 weeks and 1 day pregnant. It's going so fast, especially thinking that we transferred this baby as a tiny little 3 day embryo back in January. And now it's May. Wow. It's gonna seem like I've been pregnant for.ev.er. LOL

By the way, if you haven't noticed, I added a little poll to the right side of my blog for you to guess what the sex of this baby is. Please feel free to take a guess, I'm curious what you all think!

Just Checking In

So, it's been more than a week since my last post. I know you're all just checking your computer every 5 minutes to see if I put up a new post (Right?), but I really don't have a lot to talk about right now. Not much has changed. I'm still really tired, but have little bursts of energy here and there (which then tire me out! lol) I've lost about 5 pounds since the beginning of the pregnancy, which is normal for me. My appetite changes so much. Believe me, I haven't been depriving myself of anything. If it sounds good I eat it! I just get full quicker. Plus the things I've been craving (apples, oranges) are healthier.  I have been experiencing more frequent heartburn, which I don't remember having this early with the others. In my other pregnancies I just used tums to treat it, but I know it's just gonna get worse, so I asked Dr. Bishop for a script for Prevacid.  My insurance doesn't want to cover it because you can get a different dosage of it over-the-counter, so I'll have to see what we can do about that. In the mean time I bought some Pepcid AC and it really has helped.  I read in a magazine that they actually made a link between the hormone that grows hair and having heartburn in pregnancy (You know, the old wive's tale about mothers who have a lot of heartburn in pregnancy birth babies with a lot of hair?) So, how much hair is Sarah and Brian's baby gonna have? ;-)

Another symptom that has popped up earlier than I expected is waking up to pee in the middle of the night! At least once a night, sometimes twice already! I guess 4 pregnancies makes for a weaker bladder. But, all in all, I don't have lot to complain about, though if you ask my husband he may disagree! (Hey, I gotta have someone to gripe to.)  

I've noticed that my belly has started to stick out a little bit more, but I fear I'm entering that stage where people start to think, "Is she pregnant or just fat?" But especially when I'm laying in bed, I can feel the roundness of my growing uterus. : )

12 weeks 6 days

I had my regular OB appointment today with Dr. Bishop. We listened to the baby's heartbeat on the Doppler and it was in the 150's and sounded great. As usual, I was in and out of the office in about 20 minutes.  Dr. Bishop always says I make his job easy, but honestly I really don't have much to complain about.  Sarah and Brian weren't here for this appointment, which was totally fine since it was such a quick appointment.  Next month will be the same way, but then the appointment after that will be the big 20 week ultrasound which they, of course, plan to be here for.  

So, we're already headed into the 2nd trimester. The time when a woman is  supposed to start feeling better and getting more energy...Yeah, not so sure how much of that will be going on. Don't get me wrong, I am feeling better, but how much energy can I really expect to have when I'm chasing 3 kids around plus trying to keep up with housework and working 36 hours a week? But it's ok, because I expected this and still chose to do it. It's my only real complaint and it too will pass...right? ;)

When I picked Alex up from school today his teacher asked me if I went to the doctor's because Alex had made sure to tell everyone that I was going to have the baby in my belly checked. I told her yes, that I had and she promptly congratulated me on my pregnancy. And I promptly filled her in on the whole situation. She said it all made better sense now because when she asked Alex if he was going to be a big brother again he said no, that the baby wasn't coming home with us. We had a laugh over the whole situation, but it made me feel really good about being upfront and honest with the kids from the get-go. I guess maybe he understands a little more than I thought?

Q&A #5

Can you still, uh, you know...?


Yes..'nuff said.

Q&A #4

Can anyone at all be a surrogate as long as they are healthy physically and mentally? Could a college kid do this for health insurance?


I'll tell you what the requirements are for most agencies first. 

• You have to have had at least one child of your own. (Most require you also have custody of that child.)
• You have to be generally healthy and no major medical history.
• Never had any STD's.
• Be between the ages of 21-38 (some say 42, depending on health.)
• You have to pass a psychiatric evaluation.
• Most require that you not be on Medicaid (welfare.)
• Be average weight for height.
• Non-smoker and no history of drug abuse.

That being said, there are the emotional aspects to think about too. You really have to be comfortable with the thought of carrying a baby for 9 months and then hand it over to its rightful parents. You also need to be comfortable with the idea of possibly losing your fertility in the process due to pregnancy or delivery complications. It's because of this that most surrogates wait until they are done having their own children before they choose to carry one for someone else. 

So, could someone do this for health insurance? If you mean, are they automatically given health insurance because they are pregnant, then no. Most intended parents pay for the health care costs out of pocket because even if the surrogate has insurance, many insurance companies have surrogacy exclusions. Meaning, if it's not your own baby that you're carrying they aren't going to pay for it. However if one wanted to use the money they are compensated with to purchase their own insurance, then I suppose they could, but probably wouldn't be able to until after the baby was born.


There is also the option of matching with intended parents independently avoiding the middle man of the agency. This option is cheaper (Most agencies charge around $10,000 for their services.) but can be much riskier. You can skip some of the steps, but most intended parents don't want to chance that the surrogate they are choosing isn't really going to try to keep the baby or try to get as much money out of them as possible. And vice versa, most surrogates want the security of knowing the parents are going to do what they say they are going to. That's not to say it cannot be done safely and securely, because agency involvement or not you still have be sure you are comfortable with each other. The whole process requires an immense amount of trust.


I don't try to pretend I know everything about surrogacy, because I certainly don't. Fortunately, everything I've been through has gone very smoothly. I've read peoples stories where the situation has gone very wrong or has been very difficult, so I count my blessings. I've learned a lot by doing research online and my biggest resource is www.surromomsonline.com . Just about any question you may have can be answered on this site and through its message boards. It's a wonderful tool to have handy.